In person-centered therapy, developed by Carl Rogers, people are seen as having a natural drive to become their best selves. This is called self-actualization, and it means living in line with who you really are and what truly matters to you.
Many times, though, work, family or society puts pressure on us, making it hard to live as our true selves. This can lead to depression, anxiety, or feeling lost. Mental health problems can sometimes happen when we aren’t able to express our real selves because of these outside pressures. Often, people feel like life has no purpose or meaning, which makes their struggles even harder, especially if they’ve been through trauma or other tough experiences.
Trauma and Defences: Barriers to Meaning
A lot of people come to therapy carrying the weight of past trauma and psychological defences. Trauma can break apart someone’s sense of self, leaving them feeling disconnected from who they are and what gives life meaning. They might feel lost, unsure how to make sense of what happened to them.
Psychological defences, like denying painful memories or pushing emotions away, help protect people from overwhelming pain. But, while these defences help in the short term, they can make it harder for someone to find their sense of purpose and meaning in the long run.
As a therapist, my job is to help clients slowly peel back these layers of defence. In a safe and non-judgmental space, they can explore their thoughts and feelings. This process helps them reconnect with the parts of themselves they may have buried. With time, they can start to find a sense of purpose in their lives, sometimes for the first time.
The Healing Power of Purpose and Meaning
When clients reconnect with a sense of purpose, the change is incredible. They start to understand their experiences better, make peace with the past, and begin to picture a future that feels meaningful. They gain a clearer sense of direction and motivation.
Therapy helps in this process of discovery and integration. This might involve exploring values, passions, and beliefs, or helping clients challenge any negative thoughts holding them back from living in an authentic way. Even the painful parts of life can start to make sense when they are woven into a meaningful story of a person’s life.
The relationship between the therapist and client is essential in this process. Therapy is built on empathy, acceptance, and trust, giving clients the freedom to explore their inner world without fear of being judged. In this space, they can uncover their authentic selves and the purpose that may have been hidden under layers of pain.
Conclusion: The Path to Healing
Finding purpose and meaning in life isn’t just a nice bonus from therapy—it’s essential for true healing. Without exploring these deeper questions, therapy could just focus on short-term symptom relief instead of offering a full, life-changing transformation.
For many people, the search for purpose is at the heart of their healing journey. Living true to yourself brings peace, clarity, and a sense of fulfilment. As a therapist, I am constantly amazed by the strength of the human spirit and how people can find meaning, even in the face of profound challenges and distressing experiences. It’s an honour to be part of their journeys, helping my clients reconnect with who they really are and discover the deeper meaning in their lives.
If you would like professional support from Donna Tibby, in finding your path to healing, please call our on 07940539586 or email info@focustherapy.co.uk. Sessions are available at our rooms in High Barnet and Harrow.
